Over the years, I have been to a lot of music concerts and clubs. Lately, there’ve been all these grey-headed and bald people at the shows I attend. Old people have always hated my music. Now the audiences are filled with old people. Why are they there if they don’t like the music? And why are the performers so much heavier than they used to be?
Category: Funny Stuff
What amused me
God’s Wine Country
Living in California’s wine country is living in God’s country. That’s what we tell ourselves. Obviously, God’s plan was to pull out all the peaches and apples and hops and prunes and pears, and plant grapes in their place. In wine country, the price of grapes, especially the price of grapes in Napa versus Sonoma, is headline news. There is a friendly competition between these two wine-growing regions. Sonoma likes to make fun of Napa; Napa does not recognize the existence of Sonoma.
Q: How do you make a small fortune in the wine business?
A: Start with a large fortune.
On the Road
After years of traveling for work, I am planning my next career move: I will become the all-powerful, unquestioned dictator…
… my first act will be to mandate that all hotel plumbing be exactly the same. Every room in every hotel will have the exact same type of fixture that turns in the same directions to turn the water on and off, or to switch the diverter from tub to shower, or to adjust the water temperature. That will save the scalding/freezing surprise that comes from moving the mixing lever/knob in the wrong direction. And all sinks will have the left handle for hot and the right for cold.
Time Zones
Over the years of my business life, I’ve spent many nights at the University Inn in Seattle. Some time ago, it became part of Pineapple Hospitality Company. Pineapple has several properties in Seattle, one in Portland and, most recently, in San Francisco. Not long ago we spent a getaway weekend in The City – natives always use capitol “T” and capitol “C” – and stayed at Pineapple’s Hotel California.
In the lobby, they helpfully display three clocks, so one can immediately check the time of day in any city where Pineapple has a hotel.
Integrity and Talking Heads
Brian Williams is hardly the first TV anchorman to have his integrity questioned. If you are of a certain age, or a television rerun aficionado, you may remember Ted Baxter, anchorman at WJM-TV in Minneapolis. Take a look at Ted defending himself against an accusation of unethical behavior.